Health

Director: Robert Altman
Year Released: 1980
Rating: 1.0

There's a 'food convention' taking place at a hotel in Florida, and three goofs - Isabella (Glenda Jackson), Esther (Lauren Bacall) and Dr. Gainey (Paul Dooley) - are running for President of H.E.A.L.T.H., some 'wellness' organization ... and good ol' Dick Cavett, taking a break from stalking Greta Garbo, is there to 'interview' them.  The production history of this is troubled - it's still has not gotten a video release - and with good reason: it's just a mad scramble of people walking in and out of the frame and babbling on (an Altman Trademark, tailored to the ADHD crowd), and particularly embarrassing for both Jackson (who gives long speeches although no one's listening) and Bacall (who appears to 'freeze' in place and sleeps with her eyes open ... and claims to be a virgin).  The original intent was for it to be a political satire - 'taking shots' at Carter, Eisenhower and Adlai Stevenson - but that would have required a modicum of wit and clear-headedness.  The sole bright spot is Alfre Woodard as the hotel's P.R. director, whose disgust with the clientele serves as a kind of meta-criticism.