- 2017 Films Ranked

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2017 Films Ranked
Updated 8-1-17.

A



A-

Get Me Roger Stone (Bank, DiMauro and Pehme)


B+



B



B-

The Lego Batman Movie (McKay)
Nobody Speak: Trials of the Free Press (Knappenberger) [* Important as a kind of canary-in-the-coal-mine statement about the "news," which our current Emperor keeps calling "fake." Should Gawker have published the tape? Probably not. Should people be scared of Adelson and Thiel? Yes.]


C+

Ghost in the Shell (Sanders) [* It's better than the anime (at least it tries to make sense) ... even with the lackluster third act. ScarJo: Queen of Cyberpunk?]


C

Get Out (Peele)
Becoming Warren Buffett (Kunhardt and Oakes)
Logan (Mangold)
The Discovery (McDowell)


C-

John Wick: Chapter 2 (Stahelski) [* Just like the world of video gaming, there's an Immortality Cheat Code being abused here.]
Wonder Woman (Jenkins) [* Pandering, sure, but would there be less war in the world if women ran things instead of men? I laughed harder at the corniness of the last half hour than I should have.]
Split (Shyamalan)
Betting on Zero (Braun) [* (Presumably) Ackman-funded propaganda ... except Ol' Bill's probably right about the company but wrong about the SEC's ability to shut down a pyramid scheme. $HLF's ticker as of June 30, 2017: $71.33 ... and it's junk.]


D+

T2 Trainspotting (Boyle)
Raw (Ducournau) [* I get that Ducournau wants to touch on "women's issues" - eating disorders, sexual frustration, sibling rivalry - but she doesn't go anywhere special with it (the third act is a disaster), focusing mainly on the grotesque ("My Sister Ate My Gay Boyfriend!").]
Win It All (Swanberg)
Alien: Covenant (Scott) [* Sloppy, lazy re-write of the first Alien with some of the dumbest "scientists" you'll ever see ... but I was stunned by the ending (which I did not see coming). Franco has a super brief cameo ... but is barbequed before he can mail the rest of the performance in.]
A Cure for Wellness (Verbinski)
To the Bone (Noxon) [* It's an important subject that needs attention, but I'm not convinced the "Keanu Treatment" helps the lead very much (and the Hallmark plot isn't the best).]
Casting JonBenét (Green)


D

Personal Shopper (Assayas)
It's Only the End of the World (Dolan) [* Xavier has great taste in music, but he needs to learn how to modulate his dramatic scenes - it feels like every one ends with screaming/hysteria.]
I Don't Feel at Home in This World Anymore (Blair)
The Bad Batch (Amirpour) [* Did Ana "write" the "script" on a single Zig-Zag rolling paper? Since when does Keanu become worse than a cannibal that ate your leg and arm?]
War Machine (Michôd) [* Way too obvious, with Pitt doing a variation on his role in Inglourious Basterds. Kingsley is a perfect Karzai.]
Song to Song (Malick) [* Not gonna lie, but some of these last few movies from Terry are seriously tarnishing a fairly fantastic filmography. The star rating is for Lubezki.]
War on Everything (McDonagh) [* Does McDonagh think he's fucking Raymond Chandler or something? Shane Black just made this movie ... except with three wonderful leads and a script that's actually intelligent and not trivia and Guys Behaving Badly.]
Kong: Skull Island (Vogt-Roberts) [* Stock characters meet the title gorilla, who is now taller than the Empire State Building. Damn GMOs.]
Okja (Bong) [* Why is Jake Gyllenhaal acting like Paul Lynde? Why is that little kid so unpleasant? Why is that super pig so ugly? Also: fecal humor.]
Catfight (Tukel)


D-

iBoy (Randall)
The 101-Year-Old Man Who Skipped Out on the Bill and Disappeared (The Herngrens)
XX (Benjamin, Clark, Kusama and Vuckovic) [* Horror movies are supposed to try to be scary, ladies. At least Ms. Clark can keep her day job (as St. Vincent).]
Fifty Shades Darker (Foley)
The Boss Baby (McGrath) [* You can only milk Baldwin doing his Jack Donaghy character as a baby for so long before its single joke wears thin and you're left with some braindead plot about secret formula and toddler CEOs. There's a sequel coming, too.]
xXx: Return of Xander Cage (Caruso)


F

The Incredible Jessica James (Strouse) [* If by "incredible" they mean "obnoxious and smug" then yes, that is a correct title. Privileged whining all around ... and oh, neat, a scene about "manspreading." Christ, you Millennials will bitch about anything, won't you?]
Sandy Wexler (Brill)


© Copyright 2017 Matthew Lotti.