- 2017 Films Ranked

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2017 Films Ranked
Updated 7-6-17.

A



A-

Get Me Roger Stone (Bank, DiMauro and Pehme) [* I do realize Mr. Stone and I are ... at the very opposite ends of the political spectrum, but I've always admired his cunning and trickery (he knows it's a game and he plays people accordingly) ... and here he is, warts and suits and swinger ads and everything. If anyone is wondering how in the hell this country got in this situation, here's one of the greatest shadowy puppet masters of all time.]


B+



B



B-

The Lego Batman Movie (McKay) [* Although this was designed for the YouTube Generation and their Snapchat-length attention spans, even I appreciate its hyper-visual approach (McKay worked on Robot Chicken) and cornball sense of humor.]


C+



C

Get Out (Peele)
Becoming Warren Buffett (Kunhardt and Oakes)
Logan (Mangold)
The Discovery (McDowell)


C-

John Wick: Chapter 2 (Stahelski) [* Just like the world of video gaming, there's an Immortality Cheat Code being abused here.]
Wonder Woman (Jenkins) [* Pandering, sure, but would there be less war in the world if women ran things instead of men? I laughed harder at the corniness of the last half hour than I should have.]
Split (Shyamalan)
Betting on Zero (Braun) [* (Presumably) Ackman-funded propaganda ... except Ol' Bill's probably right about the company but wrong about the SEC's ability to shut down a pyramid scheme. $HLF's ticker as of June 30, 2017: $71.33 ... and it's junk.]


D+

T2 Trainspotting (Boyle) [* While the first one was able to balance the squalor and lust-for-life, this feels like a slow shuffle through a cemetery.]
Raw (Ducournau) [* I get that Ducournau wants to touch on "women's issues" - eating disorders, sexual frustration, sibling rivalry - but she doesn't go anywhere special with it (the third act is a disaster), focusing mainly on the grotesque ("My Sister Ate My Gay Boyfriend!").]
Win It All (Swanberg)
Alien: Covenant (Scott) [* Sloppy, lazy re-write of the first Alien with some of the dumbest "scientists" you'll ever see ... but I was stunned by the ending (which I did not see coming). Franco has a super brief cameo ... but is barbequed before he can mail the rest of the performance in.]
A Cure for Wellness (Verbinski)
Casting JonBenét (Green) [* Say what you will about the major news outlets, but at least they tried to get to the bottom of this weird (and still unsolved) case ... all Ms. Green does is cast actors to read off Wikipedia pages (or their 'invented' back stories). And if the whole "disingenous" filmmaking approach is designed to mimic the Ramseys' shaky narrative ... what does that prove, anyway?]


D

Personal Shopper (Assayas)
I Don't Feel at Home in This World Anymore (Blair)
The Bad Batch (Amirpour) [* Did Ana "write" the "script" on a single Zig-Zag rolling paper? Since when does Keanu become worse than a cannibal that ate your leg and arm?]
War Machine (Michôd) [* Way too obvious, with Pitt doing a variation on his role in Inglourious Basterds. Kingsley is a perfect Karzai.]
Song to Song (Malick) [* Not gonna lie, but some of these last few movies from Terry are seriously tarnishing a fairly fantastic filmography. The star rating is for Lubezki.]
War on Everything (McDonagh) [* Does McDonagh think he's fucking Raymond Chandler or something? Shane Black just made this movie ... except with three wonderful leads and a script that's actually intelligent and not trivia and Guys Behaving Badly.]
Kong: Skull Island (Vogt-Roberts) [* Stock characters meet the title gorilla, who is now taller than the Empire State Building. Damn GMOs.]
Okja (Bong) [* Why is Jake Gyllenhaal acting like Paul Lynde? Why is that little kid so unpleasant? Why is that super pig so ugly? Also: fecal humor.]
Catfight (Tukel) [* I've watched 250 lb. prize fighters take less abuse. Not sure the feminists are gonna like this one (gulp)....]


D-

iBoy (Randall)
The 101-Year-Old Man Who Skipped Out on the Bill and Disappeared (The Herngrens) [* Mocking geriatrics isn't funny bork bork.]
Fifty Shades Darker (Foley)
xXx: Return of Xander Cage (Caruso)


F

Sandy Wexler (Brill)


© Copyright 2017 Matthew Lotti.