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Antiviral

Director:  Brandon Cronenberg
Year Released:  2012
Rating:  0.5

In some moronic future, people supposedly clamor to get injections with viruses from their favorite celebrities and wait in line to eat meats developed from those celebrities' DNA (or something) - working for one of these injection companies is a nondescript non-entity (Caleb Landry Jones), who has been shooting up the bugs infecting actress/celebrity Hannah Geist (Sarah Gadon). Not only does this stretch plausibility past its breaking point - exactly how many people would want, say, Angelina Jolie's STDs (granted she has any) pumped into their bodies or eat cube steak made from Brad Pitt's muscle tissue? - this also fails to develop not only its 'lead' automaton as an actual human being (he's just shown shivering or bleeding, with dialogue and character development at a minimum) but also forgets to develop the 'celebrity figures' as fascinating figures worthy of what could be considered a futuristic kind of cannibalism (aside from an animated GIF of Gadon's superceleb, she looks like yet another pretty face). Cronenberg - David's son - needed to grab a primer on human psychology (not to mention a screenwriting book on how not to turn a movie's third act into a series of run-on scenes) instead of re-watching eXistenZ a dozen times.

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