Director: Jane Campion
Year Released: 2003
Schoolteacher Meg Ryan, desperate for male companionship, finds herself surrounded by countless sleazy guys in this phony art-fest; there's no chance of Ryan dating any decent gentlemen since Campion and Susanna Moore haven't written any into the story. It's your run of the mill who-done-it murder plot glossed up with smeared lens and filters and banal feminist undercurrents, but the end result is a lot of bad dialogue, dismembered babes and some un-romantic sex scenes. There are several red herrings to keep most viewers guessing who the psychopath is while those less in-tune with Campion's style will cringe at the shameless use of repetitive symbols (a lighthouse, the cat), chuckle at the subway poetry (I don't recall ever reading Dante on the F train) and conclude that a very unsympathetic and hopelessly naive Ryan should get exactly what she deserves. Always remember: Men suck.