The Farmer's Wife

Director: Alfred Hitchcock
Year Released: 1928
Rating: 1.5

A dense farmer in need of some female companionship courts several fatties and/or homely broads without realizing that his very own housekeeper (Lillian Hall-Davis, also in The Ring) is basically his wife already since she dresses him and feeds him. Unfortunately, it takes most of the picture for The Lord to channel His Wisdom through the farmer's skull, giving the Master a chance to work on his "light comedy" - take this intertitle for ex.: "A woman that's a pillow at thirty be often a feather bed at forty" - when his real forte was the blackest of black comedy (like having his characters chat about strangled bodies over pot roast). Speaking of dark humor, Mrs. Hall-Davis met a rather bleak end herself in real life: according to the IMDb, she put her own head in the oven and slit her throat. "Ghastly!" I can imagine ol' Hitch murmuring … in between his usual helping of potatoes and brandy.