Beowulf
Director: Robert Zemeckis
Year Released: 2007
Rating: 1.0
Classic English text gets 'dumbed down' by CGI whore Zemeckis for mass audiences who don't want to (or don't know how to) read - I can't help but laugh that high school teachers encouraged their kids to watch this drivel (especially since it's not exactly faithful to the source). I've always had a love-hate relationship with Zemeckis' movies: he's like Spielberg except without the genius, and he's too given to the technical aspects than the substance of his pictures (which is why Cast Away remains such a beguiling minor masterpiece and odd choice for him to direct): The Polar Express lacked any kind of heartfelt passion about the holidays and family and this surgically removes the poetry of the source poem in favor of gore. Go read the book if you haven't already - I recommend the Seamus Heaney translation.
