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Turn Me On, Dammit!

Director:  Jannicke Systad Jacobsen
Year Released:  2011
Rating:  0.5

Fifteen-year-old Alma (Helene Bergsholm), who lives with her Mom in a small town in Norway and has a phone sex problem, becomes the school pariah when she tells everyone a boy named Artur (Matias Myren) 'poked' her in the side with his penis (uninvited) and the other kids (including her own friends) takes his side (!?). Thoroughly amateurish, from the framing to the acting to the basic 'dialogue' to the story (run off to Oslo, come back, everything's better!) - it might pass as a senior project for film school - but also lacking in believability: unless Norway really is some land of make-believe, in reality the reaction of the students would be to label Artur a pervert and make Alma the school's alpha female. Nowhere else, except for maybe a porno shoot, should you ever "whip" "it out." (You should probably not masturbate on the kitchen floor, either.)

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