88 Minutes

Director: Jon Avnet
Year Released: 2007
Rating: 1.0

Comically absurd 'thriller' featuring a serial killer who hangs women upside down by one leg (it's difficult being a creative killer nowadays), a classroom full of very suspicious forensic students, an out-of-control fire truck, a British maniac with a French name and some gloriously inane dialogue ("Tick tock, doc!" had me giggling). The screenplay is such a mess that the 'appeal' of watching this isn't in the thrill of the chase - because lead forensic psychologist Al Pacino, told he has less than two hours to live, isn't in much of a hurry - but in wondering what idiotic move the script is going to make next, like having Pacino rent a taxi and drive it himself, having characters appear and disappear whenever necessary, having two characters engage in a humorous conversation about semen transference and concluding with the least likely criminal mastermind in the history of … well, criminal action (not to give it away, but would you cast, oh, Helen Hunt as a psychopath?). Goateed midget Pacino solves the crimes and saves the day, but still can't figure out how to use pomade.